Smeagol Presents: The Hunger Games

by Jami Gold on April 1, 2012

in For Readers, Random Musings

Smeagol eating The Hunger Games book

In honor of April 1st—otherwise known as April Fool’s Day—I have a silly treat for you.  Many of you know my Tech Guy, as he’s not only an awesome Jedi Master of everything computer, but he’s also a beta reader extraordinaire and all-around goofball.

Recently, I uncovered yet another one of his talents: voices.  In particular, he does a good imitation of Sméagol/Gollum from Lord of the Rings.  He made the mistake of sharing a story with me about how he started reading his daughter’s copy of Harry Potter in the Sméagol voice and an idea was born.

With the recent release of The Hunger Games movie, we decided to use that book for his debut reading here at my blog.  I’m pleased to present my Tech Guy, appearing as Sméagol, reading an excerpt from The Hunger Games:

(Or for a direct link, click here: Smeagol Presents: The Hunger Games)

“The mayor reads the list of past District 12 victors. In seventy-four years, we have had exactly two. Only one is still alive. Haymitch Abernathy, a paunchy, middle-aged man staggers onto the stage. He’s drunk. Very. He tries to give Effie Trinket a big hug, which she barely manages to fend off.

The mayor looks distressed. He quickly tries to pull the attention back to the reaping by introducing Effie Trinket.

Bright and bubbly as ever, Effie Trinket trots to the podium and gives her signature, ”Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor!” Her pink hair must be a wig because her curls have shifted slightly off-center.

Through the crowd, I spot Gale looking back at me with a ghost of a smile. As reapings go, this one at least has a slight entertainment factor. But suddenly I am thinking of Gale and his forty-two names in that big glass ball and how the odds are not in his favor. And maybe he’s thinking the same thing about me because his face darkens and he turns away.

It’s time for the drawing. Effie Trinket says as she always does, “Ladies first!” She reaches in and pulls out a slip of paper. The crowd draws in a collective breath and then you can hear a pin drop, and I’m feeling nauseous and so desperately hoping that it’s not me, that it’s not me, that it’s not me.

Effie Trinket smoothes the slip of paper, and reads out the name in a clear voice. And it’s not me. It’s Primrose Everdeen.”
[Note: Text has been abridged for length.]

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

How do you think he did?  Pretty good, right?  I wonder how many more of these I can wrangle him into making for us.  *smile*

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21 Comments below - Time to Add your own.

Buffy Armsgtrong April 1, 2012 at 6:55 am

That’s uncanny and super creepy! Good job, Jay!


Cheryl reifsnyder April 1, 2012 at 7:43 am

LOL, thanks for the laugh! Holy cats, he’s good. I love how He even switches between Smeagol’s personalities.


Jami Gold April 1, 2012 at 10:06 am

Hi Cheryl,

Or maybe Smeagol has a thing for Effie? 🙂


Jami's Tech Guy April 1, 2012 at 8:16 am

Thanks! When TechGirl (8) and TechBoy (10) were laughing so hard they couldn’t talk, and TechWife (not saying) -wasn’t- rolling her eyes at me, I figured it had to be shared.

I didn’t plan on doing so quite this publicly. *suddenly feels shy* Me and my big mouth…

Thanks Jami for risking your blog’s reputation on me.



Jami Gold April 1, 2012 at 10:08 am

Hi Tech Guy,

Ha! You? Shy? I’m happy to be the blog host for your debut. 🙂 Thanks for sharing with us!


Jemi Fraser April 1, 2012 at 10:01 am

That is completely awesome! 🙂


Shain Brown April 1, 2012 at 10:36 am

Freggin awesome. I love it. Great job, TG.


Sarah Pearson April 1, 2012 at 11:30 am

This is so much fun – and he’s so good!


Jami's Tech Guy April 1, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Thanks Shain & Sarah. 🙂 And now that I more or less know what I’m doing, any thoughts for future installments?



Leona bushman April 1, 2012 at 8:19 pm

OMG lol


Heather Day Gilbert April 2, 2012 at 4:53 am

Ha! Love it–that’s a “Happy Hunger Games!” I won’t forget! Grin.


Ava Jae April 3, 2012 at 6:07 am

Wow! That’s a pretty spot-on imitation. Creepy and funny at the same time. Loved it. 😀


Jami Gold April 3, 2012 at 8:16 am

Hi Ava,

“Creepy and funny.” Yes, that sums it up. 🙂


Jami's Tech Guy April 3, 2012 at 10:01 am

Me or my impression? Never mind, I’m not sure I want to hear the answer. 🙂

Glad you enjoyed it!



Angela Ackerman April 3, 2012 at 10:06 am

So. AWESOME. I love Smeagol’s attempt at a ‘girl voice’: “HAPPY HUNGER GAMES!”


christine April 3, 2012 at 11:24 pm

There is so much win in that I don’t even know where to start. Have him read some of the romantic scenes. DO IT.


Jami Gold April 4, 2012 at 11:51 am

Hi Christine,

LOL! I think my brain cramped even thinking about that. 🙂 I’ll make sure he gets the feedback!


Jami's Tech Guy April 4, 2012 at 2:27 pm

Thanks Christine.

I did ponder the thought of reading “50 Shades of Gray” or better yet the “51 Shades of Gray” parody but I think even Smeagol & Gollum have standards.

Any books or passages in particular?



Laura Ritchie June 10, 2013 at 8:30 pm

And they didn’t hire Jay when they produced the audio books for this series??? What a shame! 😀


Jami Gold June 10, 2013 at 8:31 pm

Hi Laura,

LOL! I know! What were they thinking? 😉 Thanks for the comment!


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