April 1, 2012

Smeagol Presents: The Hunger Games

Smeagol eating The Hunger Games book

In honor of April 1st—otherwise known as April Fool’s Day—I have a silly treat for you.  Many of you know my Tech Guy, as he’s not only an awesome Jedi Master of everything computer, but he’s also a beta reader extraordinaire and all-around goofball.

Recently, I uncovered yet another one of his talents: voices.  In particular, he does a good imitation of Sméagol/Gollum from Lord of the Rings.  He made the mistake of sharing a story with me about how he started reading his daughter’s copy of Harry Potter in the Sméagol voice and an idea was born.

With the recent release of The Hunger Games movie, we decided to use that book for his debut reading here at my blog.  I’m pleased to present my Tech Guy, appearing as Sméagol, reading an excerpt from The Hunger Games:

(Or for a direct link, click here: Smeagol Presents: The Hunger Games)

“The mayor reads the list of past District 12 victors. In seventy-four years, we have had exactly two. Only one is still alive. Haymitch Abernathy, a paunchy, middle-aged man staggers onto the stage. He’s drunk. Very. He tries to give Effie Trinket a big hug, which she barely manages to fend off.

The mayor looks distressed. He quickly tries to pull the attention back to the reaping by introducing Effie Trinket.

Bright and bubbly as ever, Effie Trinket trots to the podium and gives her signature, ”Happy Hunger Games! And may the odds be ever in your favor!” Her pink hair must be a wig because her curls have shifted slightly off-center.

Through the crowd, I spot Gale looking back at me with a ghost of a smile. As reapings go, this one at least has a slight entertainment factor. But suddenly I am thinking of Gale and his forty-two names in that big glass ball and how the odds are not in his favor. And maybe he’s thinking the same thing about me because his face darkens and he turns away.

It’s time for the drawing. Effie Trinket says as she always does, “Ladies first!” She reaches in and pulls out a slip of paper. The crowd draws in a collective breath and then you can hear a pin drop, and I’m feeling nauseous and so desperately hoping that it’s not me, that it’s not me, that it’s not me.

Effie Trinket smoothes the slip of paper, and reads out the name in a clear voice. And it’s not me. It’s Primrose Everdeen.”
[Note: Text has been abridged for length.]

The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins

How do you think he did?  Pretty good, right?  I wonder how many more of these I can wrangle him into making for us.  *smile*

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Comments — What do you think?

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Buffy Armsgtrong

That’s uncanny and super creepy! Good job, Jay!

Cheryl reifsnyder

LOL, thanks for the laugh! Holy cats, he’s good. I love how He even switches between Smeagol’s personalities.

Jami's Tech Guy (Jay)

Thanks! When TechGirl (8) and TechBoy (10) were laughing so hard they couldn’t talk, and TechWife (not saying) -wasn’t- rolling her eyes at me, I figured it had to be shared.

I didn’t plan on doing so quite this publicly. *suddenly feels shy* Me and my big mouth…

Thanks Jami for risking your blog’s reputation on me.


Jemi Fraser

That is completely awesome! 🙂

Shain Brown

Freggin awesome. I love it. Great job, TG.

Sarah Pearson

This is so much fun – and he’s so good!

Jami's Tech Guy (Jay)

Thanks Shain & Sarah. 🙂 And now that I more or less know what I’m doing, any thoughts for future installments?


Leona bushman

OMG lol

Heather Day Gilbert

Ha! Love it–that’s a “Happy Hunger Games!” I won’t forget! Grin.


[…] I posted an April Fool’s Day surprise on Sunday.  My Tech Guy made a special appearance as Sméagol from Lord of the Rings reading The Hunger Games. […]

Ava Jae

Wow! That’s a pretty spot-on imitation. Creepy and funny at the same time. Loved it. 😀

Jami's Tech Guy (Jay)

Me or my impression? Never mind, I’m not sure I want to hear the answer. 🙂

Glad you enjoyed it!


Angela Ackerman

So. AWESOME. I love Smeagol’s attempt at a ‘girl voice’: “HAPPY HUNGER GAMES!”


There is so much win in that I don’t even know where to start. Have him read some of the romantic scenes. DO IT.

Jami's Tech Guy (Jay)

Thanks Christine.

I did ponder the thought of reading “50 Shades of Gray” or better yet the “51 Shades of Gray” parody but I think even Smeagol & Gollum have standards.

Any books or passages in particular?


Laura Ritchie
Laura Ritchie

And they didn’t hire Jay when they produced the audio books for this series??? What a shame! 😀

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